Ms M and the BFF giddy from a freshly paved devotion to one another, tunneled through a sincerely undisciplined closet. Proposed legislation of a voyage outside her bed-womb had been passed. Appropriate fitting attire was therefore required. Notably, this was easier said then done. It had been some time since Ms M had on anything more then a robe unless you count a t-shirt and paper bib.

Unfortunately, the lack of concern of her digestive demands made for few figure accommodating choices.

It was imperative she find SOMETHING. Then, almost as if Moses himself parted that sea of clothing, a luminescent, still wrapped in plastic, late night shopping network acquisition surfaced. The Burberry jogging suit.  Marvelous, this would set the stage for the days outing. A long walk throughout Lincoln Park, possibly a Bloody Mary or two at the Park cafe. Just like old times with a late afternoon stroll through the Zoo. Nothing more fun then a little buzz on and a visit to the Lions den.  Such majestic provocative animals with just the right touch of scary. Ms M thought twice for a moment about the Bloody Mary. Was that Vegan? OF COURSE,…you can’t get more Vegan then a pureed tomato. It’s not even cooked for Pete’s sake!  One might redeem extra points for that.

It was a grand day. The extreme weather had conceded. An encouraging sun watched over the city skyline and goodness was in the air. You could just smell it. Sporting a very smart trotting outfit of my own, we were all more then agreeable.

This was the first amiable juncture after what seemed to be an unwavering of atmospheric bleakness. Much of the city had our same notion. Everyone was out and about. After a good mile of smiles and polite greetings an undeniable aroma beckoned from an Italian coffee vendor. While handing over freshly brewed shots of Espresso Con Panna, one took orbit, (due to the barristers unsolicited theatrics) and landed front and center on Ms M.. Putting her best MJ move into play, she was still no match for the stubborn law of physics making for unavoidable disastrous results.  Ms M jumped back tripping over me and victimizing an unsuspecting park stroller which was already filled to capacity. Lots of screaming and crying and apologizing erupted. Eventually this accidental storm calmed and everyone was found conscious and still of this world. A little bruised with possible therapy sessions on the horizon,….but all still breathing.  Reassured that their twins were fine under all that screaming and crying, the poor sweet nuclear family scurried on. Hopefully with a little luck no calls of a legal nature would ring our way in the near future. Subconsciously during her defensive play, Ms M had catapulted in reverse her new LV Favori wallet. She was surprised (to say the least) to find it resurrected by none other than last weeks HALLWAY RUBBERNECKER.   Without permission and with shameless arrogance he claimed her hand and placed the rescued wallet inside.

With a perverse chuckle he then apprised her of his stalking. He professed an affinity for women who regularly wore their food and drink proudly on their chests. (alluding to present Burberry stain plus cheap recall of the other nights tainted T-shirt) He told her she cleaned up well though and was glad to see she owned a pair of pants. With a malicious laugh that suited perfectly with his Cheshire grin, he sauntered off. Red-faced, Ms M was at an utter loss of verbal command.

The Bff was immediately full of questions as to who this new, interesting and oh so yummy friend was. As soon as Ms M could muster up and push out a cohesive sentence, she assured her that this was a strange man. Most certainly NOT listed in the friend category. He was neither YUMMY nor of interest but in fact rude and wearingly pesterous. Although the coffee cart detour made good on an expectational jolt. The two BFFs agreed it was time to move on down the road. Perhaps stepping it up a notch warranting a meet and greet with their infamous confrere….Ms. Bloody Mary.

Tagged: bff, Bloody Mary, Burberry, Burberry jogging suit, espresso, espresso con panna, Fashionable Chihuahuas, favori, Lincoln Park, Lincoln Park Zoo, Louis Vuitton, louis vuitton favori wallet, LV, shopping network, Twins, Zoo